Time and Skin Media is having a book signing
4306 N. Williams, Portland, Oregon.
Stop by and see Jeff Stewart and myself sit awkwardly at a table in a NON-SMOKING venue (I'll be both awkward and extremely irritable...fidgety, distracted, emotionally absent...yes, friends, exactly the way I am at work) signing copies of our respective books, "March of Time and Skin" and "Meat Won't Pay My Light Bill."
MARCH, by Stewart:
I finally got a hold of Jared. He asked me where I had been.
"Living in a homosexual's closet."
"Heavy."
MEAT, by Eisenlohr:
"Hey, what's up?" He put the shotgun down and gave me a hug. "Where you been, bro?"
"On the cross." I pushed past him and into the trailer. It was a coal mine in there. I couldn't see a fucking thing.
See, two towering intellects at work!
And guess what? Christmas is less than four weeks away and you know books are the great default gift when you've completely exhausted all other ideas of what to get that person you've already given far too many fucking gifts to over the years.
You know it's true!
And really, wouldn't you rather shop in a bar? People get shot in malls and the lighting always sucks the life out of you even if the irate lunatic teen nerd doesn't happen to commence his maiden day killing spree on that particular date. In a bar, the only real danger you face is a hangover. There is slim to no chance at all you'll be trampled to death by a swarming horde of Black Friday shoppers hoping to get a good deal on socks.
That said, aside from the awe-inspiring spectacle of Jeff and I PERSONALLY scrawling our signatures in your pristine, newly purchased books, deep (depression era? recession era?) discounts will be in effect, so these immortal tomes won't break your bank.
A guy told me the other day that the economy was in the tank. I called him a liar, then called the cops. They tasered him before carting him away. (Public Menace was the case they gave him.) But a point had been made and I am now willing to admit that the man may not have been entirely mad.
So, why not buy some books this Saturday?
Vendetta.
4306 N. Williams.
7 to oblivion.










































